31 days of waiting – leaning over the rails

I’m gonna get really real for a minute.

Let me be honest, since I’ve got a minute to be real.
I probably haven’t done the best job at listening to God. I’ve been in a weird funk. You know how sometimes your best friend texts you to hang out and for some reason you just don’t feel like it, like it’s nothing against them… you just aren’t really in the mood. Sadly, that’s how I feel. Just not in the mood. I’ve been trying to remain disciplined in keeping my face towards God – reading books that challenge me spiritually and taking time each day to be quiet in God’s presence… but there’s just something weird.

Okay now that I’ve been honest about that, let me continue.

One of the most detrimental thoughts I’ve learned from church is this idea that God’s will – God’s plan – God’s way, whatever language you want to use… is like a bullseye. You either hit it…. or you don’t. and the worst thing is to not hit it because then you’re being puked out of a fish or wandering in the desert for like EVER.

But with time I’ve learned for myself who God is and I can’t really get behind that. Moses, for example, made a huge mess of things when he killed that Egyptian guy. HUGE mess. God had put together this really amazing, miraculous situation and in an impulsive moment, Moses threw it all away. Way off the bullseye.

It took forty freaking years of shepherding, but God called Moses right back into the initial plan. I don’t think those 40 years was because God needed some time to think about how to clean up the Great mess of Moses, it was because MOSES needed to clean up the Great Mess. Moses needed to be humbled and to learn how to lead dumb, wandery sheep so he could lead dumb, wandery people. God was waiting on Moses.

I think sometimes God leads us in a very clear, deliberate way. I think he walks ahead of us and paves a path in front of us. But other times I think he walks alongside us and says “no, you choose this time!” because it is our choices that reveal our character, and what a great way for us to display the teaching and response to God’s love in our lives.

Sometimes we get so caught up in trying to figure out where the bullseye is and not wanting to miss our mark, and really God is excitedly waiting for us to make a move in any direction because he is our biggest fan. It’s like that Bob Goff quote up there. I love that image. Heaven is leaning over to see what we’re going to do. The ball is in our court. God, in Jesus, instructed us to love Him and others, and now he wants to see what we’re gonna come up with.