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Leaky ceilings and hurricane perspective.

A few nights ago, we bought a rug. We thought it was this big massive area rug but since we’re the kind of people who don’t look at measurements or anything, it turned out to be a rather….  well, medium sized area rug. We decided to move around our furniture (aka our couch and love seat) to see if we could find a better arrangement that would allow for a dining room table (which we still don’t have).

This is a picture of the rug. I saw on Pinterest that this is 100% how you are NOT supposed to put a rug but… idk, sorry Pinterest?

We were sitting on the couch in a new place we hated when I heard some drops.

Let me be honest here. When our old shower is left on the shower option, sometimes it drips. So I thought it was dripping. and I was too lazy to go take care of it so I said “What is that noise?” Justen went to investigate and we discovered that it was a drip; it was the drip from the first rain of fall crack in the ceiling above our bed onto the already soaked bedding underneath it.

Like… soaked. All the way through to the mattress.

We quickly pulled off the bedding and mattress and moved the bed out from underneath the leak. We grabbed our mop bucket and put it under the leak. Justen called the emergency maintenance number and was told we had to wait until the morning and I guess just sleep on the couch. Then we realized there was ANOTHER leak, found something to catch that water, and Justen called again to update them (we’re those people, y’all).

As we were finishing the dinner making process, kind of lamenting about the leak and having to not stay in the apartment we pay for, Justen said “well, at least you’re not having to find another place to stay because a hurricane is coming.” and I said “yeah, or at least we didn’t discover a leak while waiting for a hurricane to pass,” and then we spent some time talking about all of the ways the situation could have been much worse.

One of the best descriptions I’ve ever read about obsessive compulsive disorder is that a person with OCD hears hoof prints and thinks zebras, not horses. Like… OCD gets you to think of the most destructive and often least likely option and will not let you break free of the worry of that .0000024% option. It also feels really good when it’s stuff like a friend not calling you back or if someone says “I need to talk to you.” Literally if someone says “I need to talk to you,” I jump to the conclusion that I have wronged and disappointed them in some way and this meeting is to tell me that I should jump off a cliff. I’ve NEVER had that happen, but I still assume that every. single. time.

It’s easy – and I’ll be the first to admit I’m a pro at this – to enjoy splashing in the puddles of bitterness in our hearts. It’s actually kind of fun, if you think about it. It feels good to remind ourselves of how right we are – how entitled we are to certain reactions and responses – and how wrong other people are. Or, as someone much wiser (Frederick Beuchner) said:

Of the Seven Deadly Sins, anger is possibly the most fun. To lick your wounds, to smack your lips over grievances long past, to roll over your tongue the prospect of bitter confrontations still to come, to savor to the last toothsome morsel both the pain you are given and the pain you are giving back–in many ways it is a feast fit for a king.

but it never ends well. Dwelling in that bitter puddle just leaves you wet, muddy, cold and miserable. There’s no promise of warmth or hot chocolate or coming in from the cold. It just keeps you out there beyond the quick fun. Or, as FB sums it up:

The chief drawback is that what you are wolfing down is yourself. The skeleton at the feast is you.

I’ve been referencing a dry, tough season I’m going through in this post and this post. I’ve been spiritually empty and it’s been producing side effects of envy, bitterness, and a weird pride. I’ve let monsters dwell in my head and my heart and I needed – more desperately than I even realized – for Justen to put that small, inconvenient leak into perspective.

You’re gonna get out of life what you’re looking for. Jonny Lang has a song called What You’re Looking for, and in it he sings these words that I’m realizing are so much more true than I’ve realized:

If you’re looking for love, you’re gonna find it
If you’re looking for faith, you’re gonna find it
If you’re looking for hope, you’re gonna find it
you’re gonna finally find what you’re looking for

If you’re looking for fear , you’re gonna find it
if you’re looking for trouble, you’re gonna find it
if you’re looking for love, you’re finally gonna find what you’re looking for

Cause the fact is that’s there’s only one truth
And the only difference is a point of view

Time to go look for the things I want to find.

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August Empties {volume 14}

This is coming at y’all a little bit late, but better late than never, yeah?!

Some of these aren’t even actually from August, some are from June but I’d left them at home when I went to Nashville so this is like a complete Empties cleansing. 🙂

So hey let’s just acknowledge that these pictures aren’t the best I’ve ever taken. I was in a hurry and didn’t double check them. I knew it would end up taking me another two weeks to retake them so I just wanted to get these up. and throw these away. 😀

Pink Sugar Perfume
I got this bottle for Christmas a few years ago and it smells like cotton candy! It was such a soft, sweet smell. I’ve realized that committing to an ENTIRE bottle of perfume is a huge deal to me, so I decided to exclusively use this perfume. It was so great! but I’m definitely ready to get back to some of the other scents I have.

L’Oreal Voluminous mascara + primer
OH MY WORD, Y’ALL. I got these in an Influenster box last year (omg I know. I know) and I LOVE them. Years ago I got a Mary Kay primer from Influenster and fell in love and was always searching for a primer to replace it when I got the L’Oreal set in the mail. PRAISE HANDS. I love this stuff, y’all. The mascara was nothing special to me but the primer. I already replaced it 😀

Perfectly Posh Night & Day moisturizer and Bright Young Thang Face Wash
I got these Perfectly Posh samples from someone on Instagram. I’d actually never heard of Perfectly Posh before. I liked the products and the price point. The moisturizer had a really earthy smell to it and the face wash was really good… not scrubby enough for me, though. These products seem really good and at a pretty good price! Have you ever heard of Perfectly Posh?

Herbal Essences Coconut Milk Shampoo + Conditioner
Oh I LOVED this stuff. I got it from.. Influenster, I think? and it’s so great. I loved the subtle coconut smell and it really helped my hair feel hydrated! Definitely a great product.

Yes to Coconuts Coconut Oil Body Wash
Pass. I picked this up on clearance at Ulta, because I love the Yes To brands and I love Coconut, but I was really disappointed in this. It had a really fake coconut smell. Possess.

Cool Golden Organic BB Cream
OMG y’all I used this over the summer AND I CAN’T EVEN REALLY REMEMBER. I can’t say anything either way. Ugh.

Benefit Gimme Brow Gel
This was a Birchbox WIN. I got this in a Birchbox and I LOVE it. The color wasn’t dark enough for me, so I’m probably going to invest in the darker color but this brow gel was really great.

Parlor by Jeff Chastain Moisturizing Sea Salt Spray
I weirdly love this stuff. It has a really salty scent, but I think it does an AMAZING job giving my hair some beach waves – I love that it’s for dry hair. I’d spritz some on when my hair was kind of blah and needed something a little more exciting going on. Seriously LOVE this stuff.

Root Pretty Pretty Brush Cleaner
I’ve never had a brush cleaner so I have nothing to compare this to. I really liked it, though! Remember that you can always get 10% off your first $25 purchase if you use this link. I’ll probably replace it once it’s back in stock and I’m in need of a few more Root Pretty products. I seriously LOVE Root Pretty.

Herbal Essences Blowout Smooth conditioner
Anybody else find that their shampoo depletes MUCH FASTER than their conditioner? I always have a random spare bottles of conditioner. I liked this stuff. It was good spare conditioner. IDK what else to say.

Victoria’s Secret Bombshell Lotion
OMG is it just me, or does anyone else get TONS of lotion/spray stuff for their birthdays/holidays? My mom first gave me a Bombshell spray or lotion or something because she LOVED it, and it’s kind of been around since then. I like this smell. It’s definitely a lotion you use for the smell and not for the moisturizing purposes, lol.

Okay done. See you sooner rather than later for Septembers. If there’s even anything to share 😀

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September Goals

Posted on 6

Ughhh. I’m slightly dreading this. Just slightly because I’m also sure I knocked off some of my August goals. Not sure, though. I realized today that I should probably WRITE MY GOALS DOWN so I can see them. Sometimes I have this internal conflict where I’m like… how old are you, 8? Get with it.

  1. List all of my Poshmark inventory I. was. so. close. 
  2. Hit $4,000 in Poshmark sales I. was. not. close. 
  3. Post 10 blog posts LOL
  4. Read 2 books I read one and started the other
  5. Redo my Whole 30 mocha post I took pictures. That’s close. 
  6. Make a list of 25 things I like about myself I started this blog post. 
  7. Try a new recipe We tried this Southwest Chicken Foil Packet and it was SO GOOD.
  8. Get rid of all but 50 pens Yes! 
  9. Get rid of all but 5 nail polishes I mean, kind of. I think I’m down to like 7 but I didn’t put my energy into actually finishing this. 
  10. Buy fresh flowers Yes! I bought a pretty bouquet from the farmers market down the street!

% Completed: 30%… Yikes, that’s a solid F.

I’m in a really extreme time of transition, so I’m trying to go easy on my goals this month. I want to finish up some of the things I started last month, and I want to be gentle with my expectations as I’m trying to find my footing.

In Dave Ramsey’s Total Money Makeover he has an Irregular Income Budget Planning Sheet. I need one of those for time. Like an Irregular Day Time Planning Sheet. Speaking of. In the market for a new planner. I lost my Happy Planner, which I REALLY liked but I’m wondering if there’s something y’all really love before I just go replace it. Let me know.

September Goals

Anyway on to September’s Goals

  1. Have 500 available listings on Poshmark
    Here’s what I’ve learned. I cannot control how much people buy from me. I recently saw a reseller post her math that took what she wanted to earn that month ($20,000) and broke down the math to figure out how much she needed to list every day in order to get there. I should probably do this, but right now telling myself “I need to do ____ every day,” isn’t reasonable because I’m not a full-time Poshmark seller. Instead, all I can do is focus on hitting a goal that I can control, and I can control it at my own pace. 500 active listings.
  2. Read 2 books
  3. Make a list of 25 things I like about myself
  4. Buy fresh flowers
  5. Read a book of the Bible
  6. Try a new recipe
  7. Get a manicure
    This probably seems so shallow but my nails have been growing like crazy and I just need some help.
  8. Organize the pots/pans
    Every time I go to grab a pot or a pan… or a baking sheet… or a cutting board… (yeah, they’re all kept in the same place) I think, “I really need to organize this.” but then I grab what I need and don’t think about it until I’m putting dishes away and then I think “I really need to organize this,” but I keep putting dishes away.. and the cycle repeats.
  9. Make a list of what needs to get done for our wedding and finish something.
    Eye. Roll. I am so ready to be done with this wedding. Weddings are too much work and money. Anyone else?
  10. Write 5 blog posts
    It’s like one month I can nail 5, then I can’t even post 2, then I can do like 12… man. I struggle with consistency.

Any recommendations for a new Whole 30 recipe? or ways to organize our pots & pans?

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WTF, September?!

Posted on 2

I KNOW these posts are supposed to be all like “Hello, September!” and all excited about the smell of pumpkin spice in the air and the chill of fall settling and the flannels whispering my name to get out from the back of my closet but WHAT THE ACTUAL HECK, IT’S ACTUALLY SEPTEMBER TODAY.

and I haven’t posted on my blog in almost an entire month.

crying face emoji

Since the last time I posted, I’ve driven across the country – up to Seattle twice, moved into an apartment, spent 2 weeks babysitting (one away from home, one in a 3 hour commute away), and started processing life without a job.

Nothing major.

I keep thinking I WANT to blog, but then I see a pile of unlisted inventory and think, “oh crap, that’s unearned money right there.” Blogging doesn’t make me actual, consistent money. Selling other people’s trash on Poshmark does.

I’ll make a separate post with my September goals, but honestly I can’t even remember any of my August ones. Life happened super fast this month and I feel like I’m lucky to have made it this far without a negative bank account balance and still getting a solid night’s sleep. Little victories, y’all.

Something cool, though. We currently don’t have a dining table, and until we do… the wall where we eventually will put one makes for really great, easy Poshmark photos. One day I’ll get a lighting kit, but until then…

Looks much better than just laid on top of a white blanket, if you ask me! Also I found all of those things at the GOODWILL OUTLET, NO JOKE. Just saying. Also, if you’ve never used Poshmark, you can use my code (BWCTE) and get $5 off your first purchase on the app! If you’re interested in something from my closet, I’ll hook you up with a discount in addition to the $5 off ;D

I thought, “it would be nice to ease into blogging with a cute little apartment tour,” and then I realized that I still haven’t even unpacked everything and that I should probably do that first, and that’s the point where I put a few things away and then walk down the street to get a coconut mocha.

In other news, on Monday we’re starting Whole 30 because I am in desperate need of a food reset. It’s so weird, after my first Whole 30 I went INSANE. I started eating EVERYTHING. A lot of it was because I had no idea what Whole 30 was really about. I’ve been (slowly) reading It Starts With Food and I recently ordered The Whole 30 and I now have such a deeper appreciation for the heart behind The Whole 30, and I am very excited.

Also we’re having a record heat wave in the Pacific Northwest and if I don’t at least get a mild, healthy tan out of it I’m going to breathe fire. Speaking of sun, why is sunscreen so expensive? Justen and I were at Walgreens and sunscreen is like $10 for a bottle! Which I obviously wasn’t going to pay so instead I spent $22 unnecessary dollars on drugstore beauty products because they had a buy 2 get the 3rd free deal going on. You know me, the poster child for discipline and self-control. 

One more thing. Here’s a picture of me from the farmer’s market down the street. I was really pissed at Justen for not knowing how to make me look like an Instagram Celebrity, and then I ended up killing those flowers like 2 days later and I still have no idea how I did that…. any ideas?

RIP perfect Farmer’s Market flowers. You were $15 of temporary fun. Also that shirt was $7 on clearance at H&M. I tried finding the exact one on their site but I couldn’t. So here’s a bunch of other ruffle sleeves from H&M. Some of them are dirt cheap. But that’s coming from a girl who won’t spend $10 on sunscreen but spends $22 on drugstore makeup to get one thing free, so what do I know.

Okay one actual last thing. Anybody here know Taylor Swift? I think she should read the book Boundaries. I’m always kind of lukewarm about my feelings for her, but I’m currently stuck in eye roll mode when she comes up.
I missed y’all. Let’s keep in touch. XO.

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August Currently

Posted on 7

It’s been a hot minute since I’ve jumped on the Currently train. Mostly because it’s been a hot minute since I’ve actually spent any time working on creating new content for my blog. But here I am, y’all!

Linking up  (at the very last moment) with Anne and Shea for this month’s Currently Link up.

Currently…

snacking (on)…
Hi my name is Stephanie and I am obsessed with Veggie Chips. The plain sea salt ones are SO GOOD. Do y’all hear me? They are SO GOOD. Buy them all and buy them often. They’re like Pringles but apparently better for you because they have “veggie” in the name. Also, I got a bunch of salami + deli meats sent to me from Columbus Meats and I’ve been snacking on these a LOT. Justen and I kept commenting on how sometimes they had more of a kick to them than other times and I only just realized that there are more than one flavor, haha. They’re REALLY good.

anticipating…
Well, moving into our apartment. If you remember, I’ve never actually been in our apartment. In just a few days I will be there! Justen’s picking up the keys TODAY and I’ll get to see it on Wednesday WHEN I START MOVING IN. The. Anticipation.!

borrowing…
vehicles to move stuff! We actually don’t have much to move in. Last month my mom spotted a really nice couch + loveseat on Facebook so we bought those. That and my bed are really the only things we have to move in that require more than just our vehicles. It will be interesting to see how that changes whenever we move out.

admiring…
all the pretty Pinterest pins. This is a huge deal for me, you guys. I’ve been living either with my mom or roommates (who had their own stuff) for my whole life. This will really be the first time that I get to make a space mine. and by mine, I do mean mine and Justen’s but he is part of the equation that makes it mine. So I’ve been looking at Pinterest for ideas and inspiration for the feel of our apartment. I guess I’ll just share some here and y’all can let me know what you think! 😉

purchasing…
a LOT of coffee. Y’all my coffee spending has SKYROCKETED in the past month. I’m really looking forward to mornings at home with a pot of coffee. I’m trying really hard not to purchase a bunch of stuff because my employment situation is up in the air and that could be really awful combined with getting a wedding put together and all of these changes.

Overall, I’m currently  just ready to unpack from Nashville and figure out what life is going to look like for at least the next few months… then I get to adjust to a whole new life living with a boy

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