this is my blog. i don't update it as much as i wish i did, but i'm working on it.
{5/14/12} dear monday[002]
14th May 2012 | dear monday | 0 comments
{linking up with megan of the happy day blog}
dear monday,
thank you for being so warm outside. summer must be coming or something. and to say i’m excited about it is an understatement.
dear new shoes,
thank you for inspiring me to walk to the store instead of drive. it was so much more fun that way.
dear lifetime original movies,
you are trashy. and awful and stupid… and yet i keep watching you.
dear starbucks,
thank you so so so so so much for bringing back coconut. that was my official summer kick off. now if we can just get the weather to continue to comply…
dear everyone i know,
thank you for being such a huge part of my life. i love all of you and am grateful for you.
dear brittany {@threeyearsdown},
your inbox didn’t lose the guest post i said i’d send you. i…. haven’t written it. i started and then i decided to give myself time to think about if that’s really what i wanted to say, and i guess i forgot to revisit it. and the weather has been so distracting! i am sorry!!! i will get to it SOON 
{05.09.12} wordless wednesday
9th May 2012 | wordless wednesday | 4 comments
every wednesday i look forward to seeing what candice has posted for wordless wednesday. i swear to you she is the classiest girl i don’t know. the things she posts inspires and encourages me. and i’ve thought “i should do that!” for awhile, and now i am doing it. maybe it’s the sun or the fact that starbucks finally brought back the coconut flavor {is it summer yet?} but i’m jumping on board the wordless wednesday bandwagon. wordless starting….. now.
{via}
{5.6.2012} happy hanson day.
6th May 2012 | music | 0 comments
i remember the first time my mom bought me a cd. we went to target with my step-sister {who bought the allure cd, btw} and i didn’t know much about popular music. but while i was at music camp, someone told me i reminded them of taylor hanson, some boy in a band with his brothers. so i asked the guy in the electronics department if they had the hanson cd.
and this is what he gave me.
i awkwardly laughed and said “no, this is not them. they are brothers from oklahoma.” and the guy shoved the cd in my hand and went on his business. i remember staring at the front of the cd, wondering if my mom would be okay with buying me a cd of girl-boys.
lucky for me, she did.
and that was the moment i was introduced to the band that would influence my personality/life more than any other band.
today is hanson day. fifteen years ago today, middle of nowhere was released and the governor of oklahoma declared today “hanson day” in tulsa.
here’s to the hanson fans who remember albertane… and the minute the curtain dropped during “gimme some lovin.”
here’s to that first christmas with “snowed in” and every christmas since that wouldn’t be complete without “everybody knows the claus.”
here’s to the way blue, green and red will never be a random color combination.
here’s to the first time “with you in your dreams” hit close to home.
here’s to the support we have given dr. pepper over the years.
here’s to the summer we listened to “if only” a lot.
here’s to watching your favorite band have their hearts broken and feel misunderstood and wishing you could fight for them.
here’s to the underneath acoustic tour, showing us more clearly than before how talented our favorite band is.
here’s to promoting the heck out of “underneath.”
here’s to that first time you met them.
here’s to whatever happened then but i don’t remember because they didn’t come to the northwest and it made me really angry.
here’s to the walk and the walks and the early stages of TOMS… knowing that we were walking side-by-side {LITERALLY} with our favorite band, using our strength in numbers to change lives.
here’s to shout it out. the “thinkin bout something” dance. the colors. the art.
here’s to knowing every freaking “ooh” and “yeah” and “c’mon” from every freaking recording of every freaking hanson song.
and mostly, here’s to the 3 boys from tulsa who helped us become who we are today.
and finally.
here’s to another 15 years. {and another after that and that}
thank you.
thank you.
thank you.
{though i grew up thinking i was gonna marry zac, maybe you can see who is my favorite… and yes that bottom right picture is framed in my room.}
{5.2.2012} 20 books down.
2nd May 2012 | uncategorized | 6 comments
at the beginning of the year, i made a goal to read 40 books this year. as i moved the latest book i finished from “currently-reading ” to “read” on goodreads, i realized i’m halfway there! and i’m 17%, or 7 books, ahead of schedule. AWESOME.
here’s a look at the books i’ve read so far this year.
{bottom right – top l}
harry potter and the half-blood prince/the deathly hallows.
in november i started re-reading the hp series, and finished it up at the beginning of the year. and of course i cried and followed it by watching all of the movies. and cried during those. i’m so excited for pottermore to add the rest of the books, because i love reading more about the characters and the stories. {do you have pottermore? add me! i’m FeatherCloak20677}
how to teach filthy rich girls
you know what i love? i love thrift stores. and i love when thrift stores have things half off, because you can buy things you normally wouldn’t buy… like this book. i blame this book for all of the chick-lit on my list. the main character in this book, whatever her name was, kind of reminded me of my very good friend jami. which was weird, because i absolutely hated the main character.. and i definitely don’t hate jami.
confessions of a shopaholic {and shopaholic takes manhattan, ties the knot, & sister, & baby, mini-shopaholic}
somehow i’ve had a copy of shopaholic takes manhattan for years and upon finding the first one at a thrift store, decided to read the pair. except i couldn’t just stop there, since i knew there were more. so i took many trips to many thrift stores and eventually collected and read them all. the books give me extreme anxiety because she is ridiculous. but i love her ridiculousness.
someday my prince will come
when i finished reading this, i realized that i lack etiquette. and i loved this book. by the way. it’s nice to read about others big, crazy dreams and the lengths they’ll go to in order to see the dreams realized.
something borrowed/blue
when this movie came out, cassie was telling me what it was about and the whole time i kept saying “this is ENTERTAINMENT? no wonder our world is so messed up!” and then at a 1/2 off sale at the thrift store, i saw a pile of emily griffin books {they were .50 each!} so i bought them, and read two of them. i really don’t like entertainment that romanticizes or idealizes being a terrible friend and being selfish, which probably is why i didn’t LOVE these books but just thought they were alright.
can you keep a secret?
this might be my favorite sophie kinsella book so far. i started reading it on the train down to california, and had finished it very early on in the trip. i’ve started to see a very clear character/plot pattern in her books, but why mess with a good thing, right?
twenties girl
lauren checked this book out from the library for me! it was a big book, lots of pages. and weirdly, it was a ghost story. it wasn’t my favorite book, probably because of the whole ghost thing. but it’s sophie kinsella, so the book is funny and has a slight element of light-hearted mystery.
the books of ember
three years ago, jen arens gave me these books and told me to read them. the first three books came in one book, so it was fairly large and kind of intimidating. but i have been trying to finish this 40 book goal and have decided to tackle the many unread books on my bookshelf. the actual writing in these books wasn’t very strong, but i really loved the stories. book 3, the prophet of yonwood was too long and boring and felt unnecessary.. but i stuck with it. then jen told me to keep the books, so i passed it on to abigail, my favorite little reader.
sweet little lies
first of all, i bought this at a thrift store without realizing it was the 2nd book in a series. so that was cool. second of all, i don’t just think “sweet little lies,” i sing in my head “la la la la la la la sweet little lies” like the dave barnes song “little lies.” reading this book felt like i was watching the hills. which was kinda cool, because i loved the hills. lauren conrad could make asparagus cupcakes with coconut mayonaisse frosting and i’d probably try it, just because i think lauren conrad is great.
the undomestic goddess
lauren had checked this book out for me along with twenties girl, but i didn’t have time to get past the 3rd page. i saw it for sale on yardsellr, and redeemed all of my photons to buy the book. and i’m glad i did. mostly because i want to collect all of sophie kinsella’s books {oh my gosh, i think she’s my favorite chick-lit author} but also because i LOVED this book. my second favorite main character in kensella’s novels {next to becky!}.
the diamond of darkhold
refer to everything i wrote about the books of ember.
…have you read any good books this year? or have you read any of these?
{04.26.12} thursday thoughts001
26th April 2012 | thursday thoughts | 2 comments
is it summer yet? these people and breakfast in the same room with them needs to be a part of my daily routine ASAP.
{two}
ALLEN STONE is phenomenal. if i could see him perform every night of my life… i would, and i wouldn’t even get tired of it. every little thing he does is magic.
{three}
the first week of june is going to be full of so much adventure and fun that i will daily need to tell myself to stop being anxious and enjoy today, or else i’ll miss out on the next month of life because of my anticipation.
{four}
i love mail. i love getting packages in the mail. and i love when i lay out everything that came for me in the mailbox on any given day, and it looks like this:
{five}
i love baby elephants. a lot. their little floppy trunks are so adorable.
april 25th, 2012 – lost.
25th April 2012 | everyday life | 1 comment
i cannot begin to tell you how often i cannot find things. i will put my glasses somewhere or throw too much in my purse, and will find myself going “where are my glasses?” or “i can’t find my keys,” more than i’d like to admit.
so much so that emily doesn’t even get worried when i say these things.
once, i really seriously scarily lost my key. i was in seattle, and couldn’t find the actual key to my car. i had the button thingy, that unlocked and opened it, but not the key. i retraced my steps along the street and looked all in mei-ling’s apartment. i called triple a and they said that not only couldn’t they help me, but since the title of the car is in my mom’s name, a locksmith wouldn’t make me a key without my mom present… who was 3 hours away and had no idea i’d gone to seattle for the night. i’m not a rebellious, sneaky liar. i just never tell people things.
but then i had this amazing moment. i was in my car, thinking about how God tests me to build my character. i was doing an extraordinary job of staying calm and level-headed, and i felt convicted to read my Bible. and i kept thinking “no, i’ll read my Bible after i find my key…” and then got hit with a ton of bricks: READ YOUR BIBLE. i unlocked the trunk to get my Bible, and there sitting in one of the little ridges of the trunk was my key.
knowing that God cares about the little things and likes to give me chance after chance to prove myself a trusting, patient, slowtoanger child, i don’t freak out about these things anymore. plus they happen to me a lot.
monday was a beautiful day, so i washed my car and poked around the garage. i found lots of great things and found tons of things to donate to the salvation army, and organized my barbie collection.
then i went inside and began to consolidate three huge tubs of craft supplies. when it was time to go to Bible study, i realized i couldn’t find my keys. somewhere between the garage and the living room, they’d been lost. not to worry, i thought. i’ll use the spare and find them tonight when i get home.
but i couldn’t find them monday evening.
or tuesday morning.
or tuesday evening.
and i began to accept that i’d need to get new keys. which was sad, but the saddest part was that i have a mary-kateandashley keychain that i’ve had for a long time and a supersweet disneyland princess keyring i’ve had for years. i didn’t know what could replace them.
i went through a pile of purses and was emptying them out and examining the strange things i leave in purses when i switch them {tea bags, handfuls of vitamins, my favorite lip gloss, an old set of keys..} and then realized that when i emptied out the purse i’ve been using, i couldn’t find my camera.
the camera i remember seeing the last time i saw my keys.
suddenly it wasn’t “oh well i’ll get new keys,” because i realized i’d need a new CAMERA as well. but still, i realized that i always find them. i am scatterbrained and slightly forgetful, but i’m not completely irresponsible. i knew that they were around somewhere.
so i checked my trunk, which i had emptied out on monday. not in there. checked the consolidated box of crafts. not in there. checked where i keep my coffee tumblers. not in there. not in the bag of stuff to donate, not under the couch or in the couch, on the piano, behind the piano, or in my bathroom or in the spare bedroom.
and then i saw a piece of fabric i remember holding. i’d thrown it into a box of pictures. and when i picked it up, guess what i found.
my camera and my keys.
hooray!
{4/16/12} dear monday[001]
16th April 2012 | dear monday | 5 comments
this is a picture of what happens every time i press “add new” under the post category and stare at the empty fields.
i just sit there, like this, and stare. for hours, sometimes. i’ll think “i should post pictures from california,” and then i think “why would anybody care to see that?” and then i think “i should write about the book i’m reading,” and then i think “that’s kind of boring…” and then i turn my computer off and wonder why i can’t ever think of anything to write.
so i’m caving.
i’m trying these link ups. sarah and meghan {both with h, i had to remind myself} consistently do the same two linkups each week and i always think “that is so cool….” and then i never do it. but i just wikipedia’d the ending of the book i’m reading and i’m not quite ready to finish cleaning up the mess i made on saturday night, so here goes nothing.
{linking up with megan of the happy day blog}
dear monday, i wish you were a little less grey. and i wish you were about fifteen hours longer today.
dear dad, thank you for hugging me really tight when i cried and for listening to me fling words out of my mouth and for standing with me at the calendar while i pointed out every single day i am busy between now and when i go to camp. and thanks for giving me $11 unexpected dollars. it made me feel so rich i almost considered buying a car, and then i realized that all of those 0′s are not just for show. i love you.
dear nose, STOP RUNNING.
dear ikea dresser, i am so happy to have you {thank you mom} and you are just as beautiful as i had always imagined you’d be. i cannot wait to fill you up.
dear the prophet of yonwood, you are a very long book and i’ve only been interested in figuring out your place in the ember series. now that i’ve wikipedia’d, it’s going to take all of my self-control to finish your last hundred pages.
dear pottermore {and the sorting hat}, thank you for sorting me into gryffindor. i think i am the neville longbottom of gryffindor; kind of out of place until the pressure is on. i can be brave when i need to be. i was worried that answering sincerely would make me a hufflepuff {insert a joke here} but literally let out a sigh of relief when i saw GRYFFINDOR. also pottermore, thanks for being open to everyone.
love,
stephanie
april 7th, 2012 – it’s alright, everything will be okay.
7th April 2012 | faith. | 1 comment
today i walked to safeway to meet beth, who was buying a few things for our easter dinner tomorrow. as i was walking, i took in everything around me. the sun, the clear sky, the emptiness of the neighborhood, and i almost forget. i almost forgot that today was holy saturday.
last night i got to go to a good friday service at the south san francisco corps, a corps i consider to be part of my extended corps family. the o’briens did something i thought was daring and bold and perfect. we spent the first 22 minutes of the service reflecting on a list of scriptures while listening to beth play the piano and looking at a slideshow. the only sound in the chapel was the piano. it was just us, individually and communally, and God. and then we did what i’ve never understood until yesterday. we went to mitchell’s and i got a new york cherry ice cream cone. then andrew came and we played apples to apples and i completely abused the adolf hitler card. the cross got kind of blurry in the background, just like it does every day of my life.
and there was a lot of weight in what happened yesterday, for sure. the ultimate sacrifice was made, Jesus laid his life down for us, and because we know that Sunday is coming, we can rejoice in the quiet moods in our sanctuaries.
but holy saturday is getting to me. imagine the disciples. i bet they woke up hoping it was a bad dream, hoping to see Jesus coming towards them from the horizon, having just come from his quiet time in prayer. perhaps some of them woke up and started crying because they couldn’t forget the reality of it. Jesus died. he left them. one minute they were following this man, praised and celebrated, and suddenly he was willingly taken from them.
imagine the questions. what now? where now? Jesus had told them to leave everything behind and follow him. all they had was this man, and then he was gone.
maybe they remembered the time in the boat, when Jesus was sleeping and a storm was raging on..
“tiny boat on an angry sea, sails torn and tattered;
how could Jesus be fast asleep, like it doesn’t matter?”
it is hard to believe that any of the disciples could have imagined the calming of the sea. they probably had no idea that when Jesus awoke, he would stretch his hands over the water and command the wind and the waves to calm down.
in the same way, could the disciples have ever imagined what will be celebrated tomorrow, the empty tomb and the risen Messiah, declared and witnessed as alive and well by hundreds of people all across the land? today, did they know that Jesus completely messing up their lives wasn’t over – it was just starting.
the old way was gone. life on this earth would never be the same, not for all of the human race or a certain race or an individual.
that’s a conversation for tomorrow, though.
march 20th, 2012.
20th March 2012 | uncategorized | 9 comments
first of all. if you are reading this from a link on facebook, i want to talk to you. but first, a story!
in 2006, i was at mr. spot’s chai house in seattle. dave yaden had just put out a cd and i saw him play with ernie and curtis. after the show he came up to me and asked me if i enjoyed it. “yes! it was awesome!” i exclaimed enthusiastically. “did you buy my cd?” he asked. “no,” i responded. “oh. well did you buy it online?” he prodded. “no….” i said uncertainly.
“so what you are telling me,” dave said, “is that you liked the show but not enough to buy the cd.”
“not at all!,” i said defensively. “i just don’t have any cash!”
which was true. so he gave me the cd and i paid him the next day. but that interaction has stuck with me.
it’s really easy to be loose with our words. to say we enjoy or appreciate or like things. and then we don’t back it up. we love certain perfumes but settle for sample bottles instead of investing in it. we love a song or an artist, but we buy the cd used {guilty} or we download it illegally, for free.
and then let me get personal.
we say we enjoy reading our friend stephanie’s blog, and yet we never… ever…. ever…… ever comment on it.
yes, i did. i just called you out. {“you” is not one person in this case}
it is really discouraging to spend time writing blog entries and then to log into my wordpress account and get 0 comments. you know it kind of makes you feel good if someone “likes” or comments on your facebook status, picture, link, etc? and how it kind of sucks when you write/upload/share something you are excited about or you think is important and nobody says anything? that’s how it feels {but maybe more because i definitely spend more time on blog entries than facebook statuses} when nobody comments on my blog.
and when i say “comments on my blog,” forgive me for getting nit-picky {a term appreciated by team uku} but i really do mean comments on my blog. facebook is free, but my blog costs me $120/year. so i REALLY appreciate comments on my blog as opposed to facebook.
i hope none of this came across rude or whiny, because i’m feeling neither mean nor self-pitying. it’s just something i’ve been trying to internally wrestle out of my system and there’s liberation in expressing it.
march 15th, 2012 – framed
15th March 2012 | uncategorized | 1 comment
pinterest is all that is wrong with the world. it’s a bunch of sitting around and pretending we are something we are not, or that we will do something we never will do, or wishing we were something we are not. but man, i love it. and i loved the whole paint a frame and turn it into a cool display idea. like this:
{from pan and tea}
the frame was pretty big… and a really hideous olive green color.
so i painted it pink {naturally} and was so excited to have it painted that i immediately hung it above my bed and taped every piece of paper on my wall inside of the frame, creating this:
remember how i recently got a bed frame? look carefully and see how i have been living with this potential hanging literally above my head, but have settled for letting it be underwhelming.
so sometimes pinterest can be great. it’s great when it inspires and spurs creativity instead of doing the opposite, which is what it seems to do a lot.
