this happened.

Right now I’m just too emotionally drained to play the blogging game.

When I think about why I want people to read my blog, when I think about what kinds of content I want to create or the reason I hope people will do things like join the new mailing list I’m going to attempt (it’s below my “about” info on my sidebar) is because I want to be REAL.

Sometimes I read blogs and I go “cool recipe, but WHO ARE YOU?” or… “hey thanks for the 15 ways to improve my blogging, but what is so important about you that I should listen?”

I just want to be real.

That’s what’s about to go down right now.

This happened.
this happened //


My room is a mess.
I didn’t get paid for my vacation time.
My face is breaking out… probably because I haven’t been eating well.
Oh, I gained 3 lbs.
One of my closest friends in Vancouver is moving in the next two weeks and we had a little goodbye dinner.
Someone said we would go hiking today and yesterday I texted and asked “are we still on for tomorrow?” and they never responded.
Living with the weight of someone wanting to have nothing to do with me sometimes creeps in and punches me in the heart repeatedly.
I’ve been biting my nails a lot.
In general I feel kind of lost in this very moment.

I wondered what time it was in Australia because I really wanted to message my friend Donna. Instead, I decided I would get off my bed, stop binge watching Orange is the New Black on Netflix (I know, so awful. I KNOW.) and sit at my desk reading and writing. After setting my computer on my desk, I went to the bathroom. When I came back, I had two Facebook notifications. One was from my dear friend Sarah who lives in San Francsico (and I’m trying to get her to start blogging… go bully her into doing it).

This is what it said:

friendship //

That’s it.

My eyes started watering.

Then I looked at the message notification.

It was Donna. 

and I literally started sobbing.


I couldn’t even begin to fathom how two of my closest friends, in the time it took me to GO TO THE BATHROOM, would reach out and step into my lost moment and reassure me of their love. Even with my gross, broken out face, with my 3 extra pounds from vacation, my nasty chewed up nails, my uncertainty of anything…

God saw where I was at and how my spirit was so weak and he used my friends to strengthen me.

Do you know how often I think about people and never reach out to them? ALL THE TIME.

Sometimes I don’t know what to say, I just had someone on my mind. Today I texted Robyn a little parade of penguin emojis because I thought of her but didn’t know what to say. She responded with a parade of elephants.

We are such an important resource for God to use to help each other. 

Right now, someone you know and love is probably hurting or confused or worried. They’re probably feeling a little alone and a small, seemingly insignificant text message could turn it all around.

When you randomly have a friend come to mind, pray for them. and then most importantly… reach out to them. Text, tweet, Facebook, call, FaceTime… just tell them they are loved.

A few weeks ago I got a letter in the mail from my friend Lisa. It was a card, and inside it said “You are loved. You are wanted.” and that was it. Do that for your friends. I want to be so much better at that, because that’s the stuff that gets people through the rough evenings.

So anyway.

That happened. 



  1. September 17, 2015 / 6:52 am

    How amazing that they both reached out at exactly the right moment. I’m not great at that, I should reach out more.

    • September 21, 2015 / 8:52 am

      you should!!! if you think of someone just send them a text or something. you never know if the other person needs it πŸ™‚

  2. September 17, 2015 / 8:17 am

    i am so not good at this!! i think about people all the time but if i don’t reach out in that moment – i will forget all about it or it’ll be too late to send anything, etc. plus i am horrible at texting!! so i apologize in advance lol i did stop in the moment to send the parade of elephants back though! so maybe that’s a start?! πŸ™‚

    • September 21, 2015 / 8:53 am

      that’s how i usually am, which SUCKS. here i have some awesome friends and i suck at reaching out to them. texting is the worst. which also brings me to… we need to FaceTime!!!!!

      && yes. the parade of elephants. it was perfect. <3

  3. September 17, 2015 / 8:44 am

    What an amazing reminder– especially love this: We are such an important resource for God to use to help each other.

    Life can be so heavy and hard at times, but we really are never alone. Definitely going to reach out to people I’ve had on my mind recently, thank you for keeping things so real.

    • September 21, 2015 / 8:55 am

      yes!!! i’m so glad it encouraged you! “life can be so heavy and hard at times, but we really are never alone” <—-YES. we just have to remember that sometimes we're the ones feeling alone and sometimes we're the ones helping our friends lift their burdens. <3

  4. September 17, 2015 / 8:53 am

    I want to go text all my best friends now. This is a great post, Stephanie. Thanks for being so honest. I love what you said about wanting to know about what a blogger is really about. I try to have a decent mix of posts that show off who I am and provide something for my readers. This accomplishes both so wonderfully.

    • September 21, 2015 / 8:57 am

      yes!!! i hope you did!!! thank you and thank you. i feel like the combination of showing who you are and providing for your readers is to take the stories and the “real life” stuff and turn it into a teachable moment, you know?! <3

  5. September 17, 2015 / 10:17 am

    I try to mail people “just because” letters all the time! It’s so important to remind people you’re thinking of them!

    • September 21, 2015 / 8:59 am

      ahhhh LETTERS IN THE MAIL! those are THE VERY BEST! last week i put 7 letters in the mail because i was like… i want everyone to know i love them!! <3 the just because letters are the absolute very best.

  6. September 17, 2015 / 12:54 pm

    I love this! What a wonderful post. I love, too, how God always finds us where we are at. Big things and little things. He knows what we need and when we need it, no matter what we want.

    • September 21, 2015 / 9:00 am

      oh i LOVE this, sarah! it’s not just our friends meeting us in our time of need, but it’s God working through them to reach us. love it. <3

  7. September 17, 2015 / 3:29 pm

    This is why I love you, Stephanie! Keep your head up, you might not feel like it all the time but you’re a bright bright light in my day, and many others’ I’m sure. πŸ™‚

    • September 21, 2015 / 9:11 am

      SAMMY! you’re the sweetest <3 thank you so much for the encouragement!!!! it was a random rough day but i made it and i am so grateful for sweet souls like you who are in my life.

    • September 21, 2015 / 9:12 am

      πŸ™‚ πŸ™‚ πŸ™‚ i’m glad!!! so glad God’s using it beyond my one bad evening, you know?

  8. September 18, 2015 / 3:57 am

    Hey……..You’re awesome and you can’t even imagine how excited I was to text you about our shared LC obsession the other day….Also? My entire weekend trip is basically sponsored by her clothes (not really but wouldn’t that be the life) so I’ll be thinkin of you as well. Keep on, Keepin on Friend!

    • September 21, 2015 / 9:39 am

      AHHHHHH!!! KELSEY!!!! <3
      love you. thank you SO MUCH for this. how was your weekend? did you feel absolutely fabulous? she's amazing. i just love her so bad.

  9. September 18, 2015 / 7:39 am

    This is such a good reminder. It’s so easy to let that thought pass, but it always feels so good when a friend reaches out to us!

    • September 21, 2015 / 9:41 am

      yes!! it reminded me of a blog post i read on the storyline blog by shauna niequist and it said: “Because it doesn’t matter how you feel in your heart about your friendsβ€”what matters is showing those feelings through words and actions.” <—-YEP.

  10. Bailey
    September 18, 2015 / 7:42 pm

    This is such a good reminder to reach out to our loved ones.

    • September 21, 2015 / 9:42 am

      thanks bailey! i hope you reached out to someone πŸ™‚

  11. September 21, 2015 / 9:31 pm

    Remember when I sat across the table from you and told you how all of these crazy things were happening and it seemed like they were for a reason? I feel like that just happened to you too πŸ™‚

  12. September 30, 2015 / 12:46 pm

    So glad you got through it! I will always appreciate when friends text me or care out of nowhere!

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