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On being spread thin.

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Every morning I wake up and think, “I should really blog!” and then I begin the hour-long task of sharing my Poshmark closet, because my blog, on average, makes me like $10.00 a month in Adsense money and Poshmark makes me like $1000+ a month. I’m going where the money is, y’all.

But then I find myself thinking about my blog and wanting to blog and wishing I blogged and I get weighed down with guilt and frustration when the day ends and I’ve not even logged into my blog’s dashboard.

My friend Gregory once said it’s possible to be in so many places that you’re really nowhere at all, and that’s how I sometimes feel. I’m a part-time reseller, a part-time (overnight) nanny, and I am a very casual essential oil advocate. I try to be a housewife and stay on top of the laundry which has to be done elsewhere, and the dishes which have to be hand washed, and the cleaning of the counters and apartment and running of errands and… I just feel like I’m doing most of it at 30%.

I get the same “start a routine” feedback, but I never spend more than 6 nights in a row sleeping at my apartment in any given month, so it’s really hard to get ANYTHING on a routine.

I need to side note all of this with this statement: I am so grateful I don’t have a 9-5 job. My anxiety levels have significantly decreased since I’ve started really working for myself. It’s been hard to stop seeing Poshmark as a “side hustle” and acknowledging it’s my actual source of whatever income I make that month, but that shift in thinking has been so incredibly beneficial for me.

When I can, I try to set myself up for working in a coffee shop, where the buzz of human connection keeps me moving and motivated, even if I have my headphones in and the human connection means watching someone walk in and walk up to the counter, or noting that I have the same shoes, or smiling or answering a question.

When I worked with kids every day, my main goal was to help each child succeed every single day. In the midst of conflict, I’d brainstorm ways to help the child succeed even in the smallest ways. You’re unable to sit and listen to the devotion? Would you like to help wash the windows? and then a celebratory “The windows look so clean! Thank you so much, you are such a huge help! Thanks for being on my team!” Choosing to not dive into the struggle of asking a child to sit still and leave defeated because they kept squirming.

I’m trying to try that trick on myself. How can I feel like every day I have succeeded? Maybe it’s because I woke up and got dressed, or I took photos of every article of clothing I bought at the thrift store yesterday. Putting away the dishes. Responding to 5 e-mails. Reading for 10 minutes. Hitting my FitBit steps.

But they’re all over the place, and some days I celebrate an empty sink and other days I celebrate a photo roll full of clothing. There’s no consistency, no common thread and sometimes it feels like I am not actually treading water, I’m more doing the flail thing trying to grab onto anything to give me a moment’s break. Kind of like:

But I think that I’m remembering that the overall trend can be up even if some days feel lower and thinner than I’d like. Positive trend graphs sometimes go two steps forward and one step back.

and I think I’m needing to stop pretending like a blog needs to be something that is teaching people or has some Pinterest-worthy image. There was a season when I blogged every day. I found this in my image files:

may blog calendar //

…I cannot fathom that these days, and so I’m reminding myself it’s 100% okay to just blog what I personally need to blog, with no concern for if it’s SEO friendly or pinnable or whatever. I can’t do that right now.

{Oh well.}

And so even though it’s my natural resting place to sit in the ways I’ve failed or only given 50%, I’ll celebrate the positive trends happening all throughout my life:

  • I’m on my last week of a StepBet and last week I didn’t have to walk around my apartment at 11:00 trying to get in 1000 more steps because I’ve been more active.
  • In January I made less than $900 on Poshmark, but in the months since then I’ve pushed past $1000 consistently.
  • I get up by 6:30 every day when Justen leaves.
  • Overall, I feel more energized/stable than I ever have in my life. I don’t always see it in the day-by-day but when I think back to life 2 years ago, it’s really obvious.

To little victories, y’all.

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Empties Vol. 17 { Feb/March}

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Spring cleaning has sprung and I’ve recently found myself staring at cabinets and things and going “what IS all of this stuff?” and I realized that one pile of stuff were bottles of empty products to blog about so I’m just gonna need to blog about this to get these the f out of our apartment.

There are all of my empties for the past few months in all their glory. I’ll break it down a few items at a time.

dōTerra Protecting Shampoo
I wrote about the conditioner in my last empties post and everything I said about that can apply to this shampoo πŸ˜€

Bath & Body Works Marshmallow Pumpkin Latte Body Wash
I love this smell, y’all. I debated keeping it for another year to use it at the correct season and then I realized that it’s kinda fun to buy it when it’s pumpkin season, so I finished it off. Plus I was way too cheap to buy new shower gel when I was running out, LOL. I love this smell!

Yes to Coconut & Argan Oil Conditioner
I got this at Bargain Hunt in Nashville and I really love it! Coconut is my fave scent and I loved that this conditioner was really lightweight and smelled absolutely delicious

Pantene Shampoo
Y’all IDK it’s just a small bottle of shampoo.

Olay Body Wash
I don’t like Olay body wash, I guess. IDK it was good to use up when I ran out of body wash and was so cheap.

IDK what that cream blush is in the upper left. I found it and didn’t like it so bye.

Manna Kadar Eye Candy Priming Shadow Stick in Honey
Got this in a Birchbox and I’ve already replaced it because I LOVED it. It’s really easy to apply – I like to quickly put it on for a subtle, shimmery eyeshadow. It’s my new favorite forever.

MAC Cleansing Oil
Already ordered the full sized oil of this! If y’all have followed my empties posts for awhile you’ll know that I was OBSESSED with the discontinued Garnier cleansing oil and have been desperately trying to find something to replace it and DING DING DING this MAC cleansing oil is IT. It’s foamy and smells fresh and I love it. Winner winner.

Two ELF eye shadows
These were okay – they’re creamy and tend to crease. I’ve had these for years and wasn’t using them up, so I figured it was time to just get rid of them ESPECIALLY since I’ve been finding eyeshadows I love even more.

Two random lip colors – one Revlon (left) and one Wet n’ Wild (right)

I don’t even know why I bother with actual lipsticks or lip colors, I just need to stick with lip gloss because I feel SO INSECURE when I wear lip colors, especially hot pink ones (pass! It looked so much softer than it was) and dark nude colors.

Three Times Sublime Blackhead Wash + Scrub +Mask
I actually bought this when I thought it was a scrubby face wash, but it’s actually a mask. I liked it because it went on like a mask, but then after letting it dry, you’d scrub it off like a scrubby wash. It’s one of my favorite masks I’ve ever purchased!

ACURE Purifying Face Peel
This smelled like butt and burned my face. I recently had a similar bad experience with an ACURE product – I’m not sure if the products were old because I’ve had a great experience with their products before, but I got rid of this ASAP, easy peasy.

PINK Warm & Cozy Hand Cream
The PINK Warm & Cozy scent is one of my all-time favorite scents. It’s… well, it’s warm and cozy. I really love the Victoria’s Secret lotion/creams because they’re thick but not greasy. This is one of my all-time favorites.

VERB Hydrating Mask
I don’t really remember this. Which means it’s probably not that great. Masks are all the same unless they’re phenomenal, so there you go.

St. Ives Exfoliate & Nourish Apricot Oil Scrub
Okay, so funny story. I tried this and HATED IT until one day when I was brushing my teeth, I was reading the instruction label and saw that I’D BEEN USING IT WRONG. After that, I tried using it correctly and it was pretty great! If I hadn’t immediately discovered the MAC cleansing oil.

Bath & Body Works French Lavender & Honey Body Lotion
So this whole Empties thing started because I had SO MANY smelly things from SO MANY trips to the Bath & Body Works Outlet so it’s funny when they happen to appear in here. This was a great post-shower lotion. I loved the simple scent and that the lotion wasn’t greasy.


Okay y’all I’m SO EXCITED to dispose of these empties that I’m going to do that right now. Y’all should do some Empties posts and share the links with me.

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Five on Friday: April Wishlist

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five on friday //

Last month Justen asked me what I want for my birthday (which isn’t even until the end of May) and I was like “I literally don’t know,” and then I realized that I’ve been walking around saying “I really want ______” so I figured I’d just go ahead and compile a little list of the things I’m wishing for this month.

Before I get to that, I just want to say that Bailey wrote about why she stopped writing financial blog posts and I loved that. I spent a few years writing often about finances and while I’m still REALLY COMMITTED to paying off debt and eventually buying + paying off a house, being so attached to writing about finances makes it hard for me to blog about other things because I feel like a big hypocritical liar. So I’m pausing on writing blog posts about finances (aside from our debt repayment recaps and the occasional post about how we save money on things). Thanks for going first, Bailey πŸ™‚



Listen. As of now I don’t have a Squatty Potty BUT I DO have a stepladder that I will occasionally bring near the toilet and put my feet on it while I go to the bathroom and the difference is just amazing. So literally all I want for my birthday at this point in life is an actual Squatty Potty which is easily stored at the base of your toilet and then I can look as happy as this lady:

Look at that Squatty Potty, helping get her body all squatty-like. I want one so bad. They’re only $24.99 on Amazon.



TWO // ADIDAS Superstar sneakers (I’m a size 9.5 hint hint hint)

On Black Friday I managed to score a pair of all-white Adidas Neo sneakers that I ABSOLUTELY LOVE. See this picture:

I just love those shoes so much…. and I want another pair that are slightly different because they have a pop of black! Side note, did anyone have these shoes in like 1998? They were SO COOL, and I remember wanting the black stripes so bad but the ones on sale at Nordstrom were a shiny light blue striped kind. So you know what I want right now? I want Adidas Superstars with the freaking black stripe as seen in this photo because right?




Here’s the thing: I have PLENTY of planner stickers. Like… I have enough planner stickers to fully fill two years worth of planner stickers but I just love stickers, so a pack of these stickers to look at while I’m using my Squatty Potty would be awesome.




Ugh I kind of hate that I’m admitting this but I’ve really turned into that person who uses essential oils for like all the things. My current new thing is I’m trying a blend of oils to attempt to get my hair to grow back. I have these rollerballs that have plastic roller things and they’re okay but I love the metal ones that come in the dōTerra roller balls. Until I have an empty one to use for my own magic potions, I would desperately like these BEAUTIFUL ones, found on Amazon:




I’m late to hop on this bandwagon, but the theater next door (literally our window looks out over the theater roof) finally got The Greatest Showman and since it was only $4.50, we went with my mom and watched the movie and I’m obsessed. I’m about to go pay $4.50 to see it again. or I should buy the movie, go to the concessions stand and by a $6 large bag of movie theater popcorn, come back upstairs and watch it from the comfort of my couch. Also their popcorn is so good. and they serve Butter Beer… so… yeah, but that’s a side note. One more side note. When I saw Zac Efron on the screen (a pleasant surprise) I whispered to my mom “THAT GUY IS GOING TO PLAY TED BUNDY!” and now I follow Zac Efron on Instagram and I don’t know how I feel about all of this except I have this weird new love for Zac Efron. but anyway. This goes on my wish list FOR SURE.


What are five things on your wishlist right now?! Anybody else obsessed with squatty potties or just me…?

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March 2018

This year I’m documenting what happens one little month at a time. It’s on my 101 list and it’s fun to keep track of what we’re doing. I’m sure that in years to come we’ll look back on the little details and be happy that we can remember them 🙂 Cheers to that.

Coffee Shops Visited: 8

  • Crema
  • Slow Hand Coffee
  • Case Study Coffee
  • Stumptown
  • Jim & Patty’s
  • Hidden River
  • Saint Simon
  • Thatcher’s Coffee



1 – Went to Arnold’s, Crema and RCA Studio-B.
2 – Went to Peg Leg Porker, Slow Hand Coffee Roasters. Cinco with Ernie
3 – Bowling with the Halter’s
4 – Oscar’s Party at the Halter’s
5 – Surprised the twins at their school before flying home (and discovering our flight was cancelled!)

9 – I bought Bachelor Nation πŸ˜€
10 – Went to Case Study Coffee + a cute little bakery next to it. Attempted to make a paleo apple crisp and it was AWFUL. 11 – Went to the Portland Saturday Market & Stumptown Coffee
14 – Volunteered at The Salvation Army
16 – Went to Camp Kuratli to help judge the Bible Bowl Competition
17 – Bible Bowl competition. Went to Jim & Patty’s.
19 – Got coffee with my friend Brandi at Hidden River.
21 – Volunteered at The Salvation Army
23 – Walked around the mall with my friend Anna. Had Happy Hour at Feast316 and met up with some friends at the Portland Night Market

Feast 316 Camas Washington //

Portland Night Market // Portland Night Market //

27 – Went to Saint Simon Coffee Roasters + walked to the grocery store to get dinner.
28 – Went on a hike around Lacamas Lake. Justen told me it was a walk but it was straight up a hike.

Lacamas Lake //

30 – Spent the day at camp with the Nottles.

31 – Went to Thatcher’s, spent the evening with Alan + Maria

Books Read: 2

#Girlboss and Bachelor Nation (you can read my reviews here)

Bachelor Nation //

Blog Posts Written: 4

Things Accomplished from my 101 in 1001 List:

  • 6 blog posts (#38)
  • 5 coffee shops (#47)
  • Tried a new recipe (#50)
  • 2 books (#57)
  • Bought myself flowers (#68)

Catch up on our year:

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April 2018 Goals

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Freaking March…. and that’s all I have to say about that. Here’s how I did on my March goals. I was really close to some of them, ugh.

  1. Read 2 books
  2. 50 entries to gratitude journal
  3. Meet FitBit goals 10xs
    I didn’t even CHARGE my Fitbit until like March 16th. I hit my goals 8 times between March 16-31, which was pretty good and I totally would have made it if I’d charged the stupid thing earlier.
  4. Buy flowers
  5. Try new recipe
    We tried another Lemon Chicken recipe!
  6. Join a gym
    OK so turns out gyms are kind of expensive (what the heck?) so instead I started to be more intentional with at-home workouts, which actually became more of a thing! So even though I didn’t actually accomplish this, I did kind of accomplish what I was hoping would come out of it.
  7. Track my spending
    We spent a lot. It was hard to track because I forgot to do it daily and didn’t know how to figure out what I’d spent money on a week prior. Ugh.
  8. List 100 items
    I listed 93. I was so close. Whatever.
  9. Post 6 blogs
    Nope. I think I did four. One a week. I’m a rockstar.
  10. Get caught up on Poshmark books

5/10. 50%. Ughhhhh. I was SO CLOSE to some of them, but got really serious about it too late to actually finish it. Oh. well.

I’m fighting a little bit of defeat and just kind of meh feelings these days so I’m going to look at that as glass half full. Last month I only did 4, so I actually improved, haha.

april goals //

April Goals

  1. New Recipe
  2. Buy Flowers
  3. Read 2 books
  4. Wear earrings every day for a month and get rid of any I don’t wear or like (#71 on my 101 list)
  5. add 50 entries to my gratitude journal
  6. Go on a hike
  7. Send 4 letters
  8. Celebrate a random holiday
  9. Try a new coffee shop
  10. Clean up my blog’s draft folder

Okay so spoiler alert. It’s April 3rd and I’ve already accomplished 2 of those. Last night I bought myself flowers (Bless you, 1/2 off Easter flowers at Fred Meyer) and we tried a new recipe. So I’m gonna go ahead and do myself a favor and start this month with those two things crossed off, thank ya’ very much.

You know what random holiday we’re going to celebrate? Freaking Caramel Popcorn Day. It’s on April 7th. Just in case y’all wanted to add it to your calendars or something. πŸ™‚

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