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Don’t cry over spilled hot sauce.

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Today I had this brilliant idea to clean out the pantry, which was the only thing on our to do list. Not that there’s nothing else to do, it’s just that it’s the only thing we’d written down.

As I was organizing something on the top shelf, as if in slow motion, the bottle of Frank’s Hot Sauce was knocked over and fell to the floor, which popped off the top and sent hot sauce LITERALLY FLYING ALL OVER THE KITCHEN. I seriously found hot sauce like 5 feet away.

I hate hot sauce.

I hate the smell. I hate the taste. In fact, the ONLY REASON I buy this is so we can make buffalo sauce. I NEVER use this on its own.

And suddenly it was all over my (new) pants, my (just washed) favorite shirt, and my freshly showered feet. I reeked of hot sauce. The kitchen reeked of hot sauce. and my plans of quickly organizing the pantry and and being on my way slowly slipped away.

I rolled my eyes, took a picture for good measure, and then realized there was nothing to do but clean it up.

There’s been a LOT of stuff in my life that I just don’t like but lately have felt covered in. Like gravity and a bump of the elbow, things beyond my control have fallen at my feet and it’s been up to me to mouth-breathe my way through cleaning up a mess that makes me gag.

As I stood there, eyes straight up rolled to the ceiling, I realized that sometimes my tendency is to walk out of the room when gravity pulls crap to the floor in front of me. I like to just say “I didn’t do this,” and refuse to address my responsibility to clean it, regardless of if I “DID” it or not. Sometimes if you stop and look around and there’s no other party to clean up the mess, job’s on you. Not because you DID anything, but because there are consequences to walking away (like even smellier hot sauce, sticky floors, hot sauce foot prints in every room of the apartment).

So here’s to being responsible and putting things on hold to tend to messes that fall at our feet regardless of our participation in the making of them.

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May 2018 Goals

Shoot y’all. May is LITERALLY HALFWAY OVER and I’m just now dropping my goals for the month here. April was rough. I always reference my planner for my goals and Justen put my planner away and I couldn’t find it. ๐Ÿ˜ ALL THINGS CONSIDERED, when I finally looked back at my goals I was excited that I did much better than I’d imagined.

April Goals:

  1. New Recipe
  2. Buy Flowers
  3. Read 2 books
  4. Wear earrings every day for a month and get rid of any I donโ€™t wear or like (#71 on my 101 list)
    So this just in: earrings absolutely destroy my ears, does anyone else have this problem? My piercings kept getting kind of infected. I wore earrings every day the best I could and have determined the few earrings I’d like to keep. I figured that counted ๐Ÿ˜€
  5. add 50 entries to my gratitude journal
  6. Go on a hike
  7. Send 4 letters
  8. Celebrate a random holiday
    Caramel Popcorn Day. It didn’t end well, let’s just leave it at that.
  9. Try a new coffee shop
  10. Clean up my blogโ€™s draft folder

Completed: 6/10 60%

ANYWAY. On to May. That rhymes :]

May Goals //


  1. Try a new recipe
  2. Buy myself flowers
  3. Send bday cards to Hannah & Cillian
  4. Try a new coffeeshop
  5. Go on a hike
  6. Order Poshmark business cards
  7. Read 2 books {1 of 2 finished}
  8. 50 gratitude entries
  9. Take photos of 10 things that make me happy
  10. Go on 3 walks and listen to podcasts {1 of 3}

It’s weird how setting goals takes some fine tweaking. I need to figure out how to set really realistic and beneficial goals that I’m excited about working towards. Because we’re already halfway through the month, there’s some stuff I’ve already accomplished. Now if only I could remember to add these freaking goal posts at the freaking beginning of the month, lol.


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April 2018 Debt Repayment Recap

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April 2018 Debt Repayment Recap

Last month I decided to try and start bi-weekly Poshmark Paydays. That didn’t work, like at all. I stupidly turned my credit card into what I was using to purchase my Poshmark inventory and so that created a balance on my credit card. Instead of bi-weekly I decided to start weekly Poshmark paydays.

Also, for whatever reason, I’m just really struggling to save up to pay off my phone. Maybe because it’s the mental thing of having to save the whole remaining balance in order to pay it off, but it’s just a bit of a struggle right now. Anybody have any ideas for that?

My car seems to have dropped a lot but it’s because this recap is coming a little late, so two car payments have posted whereas usually there’s just one when this recap posts.

ONE LAST THING. Working for yourself and having an irregular income is hard for me with this debt repayment stuff. I did really well when I’d get a consistent paycheck from an employer, but it’s hard for me to get my feet underneath me. I’m figuring out what payment schedule works best for me, and we’re now taking all of our monthly bills out of Justen’s paycheck so I’m hoping that helps me see my paycheck as the fuel for our debt destroying fire.

Southwest CC:ย 0 394.57ย 
Stephanieโ€™s Phone: 744.02 706.43 {-5.05}
Justenโ€™s Car: ย 5399.22 5248.73 {-2.78%}
Stephanieโ€™s Car: ย 13,647.05 13,136.83 {-3.73%}

Total:ย  19790.29 ย 19,186.56 {-3.05%}

2018 Total Payoff: $23,661.40 $19,186.56 {-18.911%}

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On being spread thin.

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Every morning I wake up and think, “I should really blog!” and then I begin the hour-long task of sharing my Poshmark closet, because my blog, on average, makes me like $10.00 a month in Adsense money and Poshmark makes me like $1000+ a month. I’m going where the money is, y’all.

But then I find myself thinking about my blog and wanting to blog and wishing I blogged and I get weighed down with guilt and frustration when the day ends and I’ve not even logged into my blog’s dashboard.

My friend Gregory once said it’s possible to be in so many places that you’re really nowhere at all, and that’s how I sometimes feel. I’m a part-time reseller, a part-time (overnight) nanny, and I am a very casual essential oil advocate. I try to be a housewife and stay on top of the laundry which has to be done elsewhere, and the dishes which have to be hand washed, and the cleaning of the counters and apartment and running of errands and… I just feel like I’m doing most of it at 30%.

I get the same “start a routine” feedback, but I never spend more than 6 nights in a row sleeping at my apartment in any given month, so it’s really hard to get ANYTHING on a routine.

I need to side note all of this with this statement: I am so grateful I don’t have a 9-5 job. My anxiety levels have significantly decreased since I’ve started really working for myself. It’s been hard to stop seeing Poshmark as a “side hustle” and acknowledging it’s my actual source of whatever income I make that month, but that shift in thinking has been so incredibly beneficial for me.

When I can, I try to set myself up for working in a coffee shop, where the buzz of human connection keeps me moving and motivated, even if I have my headphones in and the human connection means watching someone walk in and walk up to the counter, or noting that I have the same shoes, or smiling or answering a question.

When I worked with kids every day, my main goal was to help each child succeed every single day. In the midst of conflict, I’d brainstorm ways to help the child succeed even in the smallest ways. You’re unable to sit and listen to the devotion? Would you like to help wash the windows? and then a celebratory “The windows look so clean! Thank you so much, you are such a huge help! Thanks for being on my team!” Choosing to not dive into the struggle of asking a child to sit still and leave defeated because they kept squirming.

I’m trying to try that trick on myself. How can I feel like every day I have succeeded? Maybe it’s because I woke up and got dressed, or I took photos of every article of clothing I bought at the thrift store yesterday. Putting away the dishes. Responding to 5 e-mails. Reading for 10 minutes. Hitting my FitBit steps.

But they’re all over the place, and some days I celebrate an empty sink and other days I celebrate a photo roll full of clothing. There’s no consistency, no common thread and sometimes it feels like I am not actually treading water, I’m more doing the flail thing trying to grab onto anything to give me a moment’s break. Kind of like:

But I think that I’m remembering that the overall trend can be up even if some days feel lower and thinner than I’d like. Positive trend graphs sometimes go two steps forward and one step back.

and I think I’m needing to stop pretending like a blog needs to be something that is teaching people or has some Pinterest-worthy image. There was a season when I blogged every day. I found this in my image files:

may blog calendar //

…I cannot fathom that these days, and so I’m reminding myself it’s 100% okay to just blog what I personally need to blog, with no concern for if it’s SEO friendly or pinnable or whatever. I can’t do that right now.

{Oh well.}

And so even though it’s my natural resting place to sit in the ways I’ve failed or only given 50%, I’ll celebrate the positive trends happening all throughout my life:

  • I’m on my last week of a StepBet and last week I didn’t have to walk around my apartment at 11:00 trying to get in 1000 more steps because I’ve been more active.
  • In January I made less than $900 on Poshmark, but in the months since then I’ve pushed past $1000 consistently.
  • I get up by 6:30 every day when Justen leaves.
  • Overall, I feel more energized/stable than I ever have in my life. I don’t always see it in the day-by-day but when I think back to life 2 years ago, it’s really obvious.

To little victories, y’all.

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Empties Vol. 17 { Feb/March}

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Spring cleaning has sprung and I’ve recently found myself staring at cabinets and things and going “what IS all of this stuff?” and I realized that one pile of stuff were bottles of empty products to blog about so I’m just gonna need to blog about this to get these the f out of our apartment.

There are all of my empties for the past few months in all their glory. I’ll break it down a few items at a time.

dลTerra Protecting Shampoo
I wrote about the conditioner in my last empties post and everything I said about that can apply to this shampoo ๐Ÿ˜€

Bath & Body Works Marshmallow Pumpkin Latte Body Wash
I love this smell, y’all. I debated keeping it for another year to use it at the correct season and then I realized that it’s kinda fun to buy it when it’s pumpkin season, so I finished it off. Plus I was way too cheap to buy new shower gel when I was running out, LOL. I love this smell!

Yes to Coconut & Argan Oil Conditioner
I got this at Bargain Hunt in Nashville and I really love it! Coconut is my fave scent and I loved that this conditioner was really lightweight and smelled absolutely delicious

Pantene Shampoo
Y’all IDK it’s just a small bottle of shampoo.

Olay Body Wash
I don’t like Olay body wash, I guess. IDK it was good to use up when I ran out of body wash and was so cheap.

IDK what that cream blush is in the upper left. I found it and didn’t like it so bye.

Manna Kadar Eye Candy Priming Shadow Stick in Honey
Got this in a Birchbox and I’ve already replaced it because I LOVED it. It’s really easy to apply – I like to quickly put it on for a subtle, shimmery eyeshadow. It’s my new favorite forever.

MAC Cleansing Oil
Already ordered the full sized oil of this! If y’all have followed my empties posts for awhile you’ll know that I was OBSESSED with the discontinued Garnier cleansing oil and have been desperately trying to find something to replace it and DING DING DING this MAC cleansing oil is IT. It’s foamy and smells fresh and I love it. Winner winner.

Two ELF eye shadows
These were okay – they’re creamy and tend to crease. I’ve had these for years and wasn’t using them up, so I figured it was time to just get rid of them ESPECIALLY since I’ve been finding eyeshadows I love even more.

Two random lip colors – one Revlon (left) and one Wet n’ Wild (right)

I don’t even know why I bother with actual lipsticks or lip colors, I just need to stick with lip gloss because I feel SO INSECURE when I wear lip colors, especially hot pink ones (pass! It looked so much softer than it was) and dark nude colors.

Three Times Sublime Blackhead Wash + Scrub +Mask
I actually bought this when I thought it was a scrubby face wash, but it’s actually a mask. I liked it because it went on like a mask, but then after letting it dry, you’d scrub it off like a scrubby wash. It’s one of my favorite masks I’ve ever purchased!

ACURE Purifying Face Peel
This smelled like butt and burned my face. I recently had a similar bad experience with an ACURE product – I’m not sure if the products were old because I’ve had a great experience with their products before, but I got rid of this ASAP, easy peasy.

PINK Warm & Cozy Hand Cream
The PINK Warm & Cozy scent is one of my all-time favorite scents. It’s… well, it’s warm and cozy. I really love the Victoria’s Secret lotion/creams because they’re thick but not greasy. This is one of my all-time favorites.

VERB Hydrating Mask
I don’t really remember this. Which means it’s probably not that great. Masks are all the same unless they’re phenomenal, so there you go.

St. Ives Exfoliate & Nourish Apricot Oil Scrub
Okay, so funny story. I tried this and HATED IT until one day when I was brushing my teeth, I was reading the instruction label and saw that I’D BEEN USING IT WRONG. After that, I tried using it correctly and it was pretty great! If I hadn’t immediately discovered the MAC cleansing oil.

Bath & Body Works French Lavender & Honey Body Lotion
So this whole Empties thing started because I had SO MANY smelly things from SO MANY trips to the Bath & Body Works Outlet so it’s funny when they happen to appear in here. This was a great post-shower lotion. I loved the simple scent and that the lotion wasn’t greasy.


Okay y’all I’m SO EXCITED to dispose of these empties that I’m going to do that right now. Y’all should do some Empties posts and share the links with me.

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