january 3rd, 2012 – dreams.

4th January 2012 | 365 | 1 comment

{3/365 – dreams}

first of all, nobody called me out on the fact that i put january 2nd, 2011 for yesterday’s blog title. oh well.

today was a special day. today darren criss debuted on broadway. and so i’ve got a lot of emotions inside of me, because someone’s dreams are coming true, and their dream coming true was in the ny times.

since october i’ve done a lot of thinking about dreams. i don’t really know if i have any, which is a sad truth. every time i think “that would make an excellent dream,” i get overwhelmed by the dream-iness of it and want to scale it down, to bring it back within reach. but today i’ve had a fresh air of clarity around me, as i’ve walked around thinking “darren criss is probably freaking out right now,” or “i bet darren criss’s parents are so nervous for him,” or “is he seeing all of these tweets? he is so adored.” and i realized that dreams are big. “dream big” is a false idea, because if dreams are not big then they are not dreams; they are goals.

tonight i saw all of the pictures and stories of his opening night. and i am so excited for him. and for us, and the world. because right now all around the world people are declaring dreams and people are realizing dreams. some are in the form of a marriage proposal or a new car or finishing a marathon, and some are doing a little song and dance in front of a sold out crowd. but they’re happening. and we’d all better jump on board before we are 60 and wishing we’d spent our lives dreaming instead of drowning.

what are your dreams?

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Monday, Monday…..

7th November 2011 | everyday life | 1 comment

I auditioned for The Glee Project. No really, I did. Please click here and watch the video and “like” it on the page. And then share it with your friends.
Today I attempted to make pink cookies. They were a massive fail, and I have a picture to prove it:

See! Not even pink! I tried to save the reddish color by attempting to turn it purple, which just looked blue, so I added green. It was just an all around fail.
This really happened:
Yesterday we had a Glee marathon. I was late {I’m always late} and this is what happened as a result:

and then, waiting on the door when I finally arrived…

My beloved baby Bram turned SIX! and I went to his birthday party. SIX!!!!

seems like these days with him were just yesterday….
Remember how I said that I am always late? If I don’t leave soon, I will definitely be late for Bible study. But I came to Starbucks to write this, and it’s been so long since I’ve been in a Starbucks writing and thinking. It feels good.

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31 Days of Song – {31/31} Not Alone

31st October 2011 | 31 days of song | 1 comment

This is the first time I have ever finished something like this. So even though you cannot see it, I am sitting here drinking a cup of coffee and giving myself a huge pat on the back. Even though.. I completely missed #27. I cannot for the life of me figure out what happened to it. I know exactly what song it was supposed to be, because as I was compiling a list I thought “…what happened to the other John Mayer song?” Sigh. Another double post. Oh well. At least I didn’t give up.

Song #31 Not Alone by Darren Criss

I knew this song would be my last one.

There it lives, holding steady in my top 25 most played. If you were to somehow make a playlist that was “most often played,” like given the amount of days its been in your library and how frequently you listened.. that would be #1, without a doubt.

Over on Annie’s blog, she asked us about our songs that make us feel courageous {she’s been writing about courage for 31 days} and this is what I said after commenting with this song:

I tend to need courage the most when I’m already beaten down, so many of mine are ballads so that when I’m listening to “sad” music and crying in my room, I get a bit of a kick in the butt, a bit of safety in numbers if you will.

I say “safety in numbers” SO OFTEN, because I believe that we all need to really understand it. Alienation and alone-ness can destroy people and have sparked terrible terrible actions. There are people that can relate to our pain, to our hurt, our loneliness, our fears and doubts and worries. They might not be sitting in the same room, but THEY ARE OUT THERE.

Someone wrote about this song on Tumblr, and I commented how strange it is to feel safety in numbers sitting alone in your room and listening to a song that says “You’re not alone, cuz I’m here with you.”

It’s just a great, beautiful song. I made Cassie a mix CD and put this song on there and she loves it too. I will take over the world and make everyone love this song. One person at a time.

Song #27 Covered in Rain by John Mayer

When I lived in Seattle and was still going to school, I watched the Any Given Thursday performance of this song EVERY MORNING BEFORE SCHOOL. There was something about this song that gave me peace and energy. It’s the sequel to the song “City Love,” written in the wake of 9-11.

I love music that is passionate, and this song is passionate. And I love songs that capture emotions or situations, and this song sounds like standing outside in the rain without an umbrella.

And once I had this crazy idea for a story, one that was based off of emotions I felt from songs. This song was the basis for the whole story. I kept all of my pieces of paper with the plot and characters and moments, just in case I ever felt like actually doing something about it.

So there it is. 31 days of song.

I love these songs. and many more, but I only did 31 days of song. If you want a couple CDs with all of these songs on them.. e-mail me. Or leave me a comment here and I’ll e-mail you or something. I love sharing.

31 Days of Song

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31 Days of Song {5/31} – You Shook Me All Night Long

5th October 2011 | 31 days of song | 0 comments

Okay FIRST. I would just like to say that I do not want to wait until NOVEMBER for a new Glee episode. Hello, October just began! SECOND. At first I kind of thought last night’s episode of Glee was ho-hum… except the last five minutes. It gets so hard to open up and share about having OCD when people think of it as funny or amusing, like in Monk… when it is really something that affects not just me but people around me and can sometimes feel like a prison in my own mind. So many times I have knelt next to my bed and prayed for help, relief, healing, restoration or even just a small break from my OCD. Needless to say, my eyes got a little leaky.

THIRD. I think Darren Criss is the loveliest boy alive, and I loved this:

I know it was the work of writers, but it came out of the mouth of Darren Criss and I just sat there in my pajamas holding back the urge to hug the TV. Because the TV is right by our front windows and our neighborhood is snoopy.

Moving on…

** I copy/pasted this from my wordpress.com blog. **

Song #5: You Shook Me All Night Long by AC/DC (youtube)

Before I write anything, I must give you a visual. This story takes place when I was a little tiny person of four years old. Here is a picture of me around that time.

little me.

My dad’s favorite band used to be AC/DC. If I couldn’t sleep, my dad would drive me around the neighborhood and put some AC/DC on the radio to get me to sleep. I became familiar with the tunes and decided that You Shook Me All Night Long was the best song.

One day, I stopped loving the song.
Not for reasons of my own, but from outside pressures. From adults. Adults never understand.

My mom dropped me off at daycare one day. I was doing my 4-year-old thing, and suddenly had the urge to break into song. So of course I started singing my favorite song, which says..

She was a fast machine
She kept her motor clean
She was the best damn woman that I’d ever seen

One of the daycare teachers heard this.

And promptly washed my mouth out with soap.

The only time I’ve ever had my mouth washed out with soap.

You’d think that it taught me to watch my mouth around adults, but it didn’t. A few years later in first grade I got in trouble for making a boy cry when he asked me on a date and I screamed across the playground “I would never go on a f***ing date with you ever!!!!”

Hello my name is Stephanie and my rebellious years happened between the ages of 4 and 7.

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2013 Reading Challenge

january 3rd, 2012 – dreams.

4th January 2012 | 365 | 1 comment

Monday, Monday…..

7th November 2011 | everyday life | 1 comment

31 Days of Song – {31/31} Not Alone

31st October 2011 | 31 days of song | 1 comment

31 Days of Song {5/31} – You Shook Me All Night Long

5th October 2011 | 31 days of song | 0 comments