A Year of Challenge: May
1st May 2013 | uncategorized | 2 comments
HAPPY BIRTHDAY MONTH.
Make sure everyone knows. Stop being quiet about it.
Remember that person you prayed for EVERY DAY last month? Write them a letter. Right now. Go do it. Once you have finished, pull out that unopened letter from April 1 and read it. Has anything changed… like your heart?
This month’s challenge isn’t necessarily daily, but don’t get lazy. Take a picture of 101 things that make you happy. It’s your birthday. Celebrate the life you live and the parts of your life that bring you extreme joy. Here’s a hint: you SHOULD be going to the Wildlife Safari to encounter an elephant, so there’s an easy picture. Want another easy one? You should be going to Disneyland in a few weeks. Happiest place on earth, so there should be a bunch of easy ones there. Just keep your eyes open.
May: Take a picture of 101 things that make me happy.
FINISHED:
- Take a picture of 101 things that make me happy
- Paint my desk {the weather should be starting to cooperate!}
- Bury a time capsule.
- Go rollerskating. Maybe you should have a Golden Skate birthday party, because those were awesome in middle school.
PROGRESS:
- Monthly self-portrait {5/12}
- Monthly flowers {5/12}
- Send 5 letters {69/101}
Visit a far away friend – LOS ANGELES – {3/5}- Take my parents out to lunch 10xs – it’s mother’s day + mom’s bday! go twice! {4/10}
Monthly new recipe – whole wheat sesame noodles with spicy peanut sauce – {5/12}- Document an ordinary day in pictures {4/10}
- 365!
fully
29th April 2013 | uncategorized | 1 comment
Yesterday I was on my knees, praying for the strength to tackle the rest of spring. Spring, for all of its new life and growth and rejuvenation has always been marked with unexpected death. At least it has for me, since the 8th grade.
So I look into the face of grief, wade through the wake of death and wonder how to live with the reality of mortality.
The answer hit me today.
Fully.
We live fully with the reality that we are all born fully inflated balloons with a tiny hole. Our lives are slowly deflating, the days daily coming closer to an end.
And so we run. Boldly and without abandon, into the messiness of life. We get tangled up in love and in people, allowing ourselves to be woven together with other people in good and bad, but not fearing the knot.
I try to live this way every day, but some days the expiration date of life is painfully more in focus than other days. We are called to quick prayer for someone who is in the hospital, who has quickly departed, or who is bracing themselves for goodbye.
Right now I am praying for all three above and in the same breath praying that those of us who remain alive and well can also find the strength to live alive, well and fully.
A Year of Challenge: April
1st April 2013 | uncategorized | 0 comments
Happy April Fools Day, from December 28th, 2012. I hope you pull many pranks and fall for none. Today is a terrible day to change your Facebook relationship status if you’re in a new relationship. Trust me, I did it on accident once.
April showers should be happening, so hold fast young grasshopper.. the winter is thawing and soon the days will grow lighter and longer again. Speaking of ice thawing, this is a month of spiritual challenge.
Stephanie, today you need to pick a person you don’t like. Just one. And you need to write a letter to them and be completely honest. Put it in a sealed envelope and tuck it away in your Bible or journal, but do. not. open it. Just trust me on this one. Go do it RIGHT NOW.
April: Pray for someone I don’t like every day for a month {#86}
FINISHED
Pray for someone I don’t like every day for a month {#86}- Make up a secret handshake with someone {#33}
Make a map of everywhere I’ve been {#47} {You’ll probably be looking for this link, so you’re welcome}- Buy. a. guitar. {#16}
PROGRESS
Monthly self-portrait {4/12}Monthly flowers {4/12}New recipe! Coconut Curry Noodles. Looks delish. {4/12}Send 5 letters {64/101}Send a care package! {1/10}Visit 2 new coffeeshops {13/25}- Attend a crafting workshop/class {1/5} {again, here’s a link that will be useful for you. No excuses!~}
- 365.
Too much of a good thing.
25th March 2013 | uncategorized | 0 comments
Lately, something I really lack has been coming up a lot in conversation. I’ll tell you what it is.
Discipline.
I have always lacked discipline. My mom always wanted a little girl, and so I think that when I was born she was so happy to have me that she just… wanted me. I’ve always been spoiled, bailed out and excused. Consequences rarely stuck, and it was okay because for the most part I’m not a terrible person.
The Bible says that God disciplines those he loves, and now I get it. Discipline creates discipline.
Discipline is really the act of loving correction through consequence. With the kids I know, I do it a lot… “I’m going to let you decide. If I have to ask you one more time to stand up and participate, then you owe me a minute when we are in the gym.” The decision is theirs, and if they choose to not participate, it’s up to me to sit next to them with a 1 minute timer so they will start to learn that I mean business and they need to respect my instruction.
Because I LOVE THEM, and I want them to participate and not get in worse trouble than sitting out for a minute in the gym.
The more good decisions we make the easier making them becomes, and we are transforming. Like Bumblebee.
Since I never really had consequences, I never really learned discipline. I’m not a terrible person; my biggest vice is that I’ve developed the habit of ordering a pastry with every cup of coffee I have. But just because I’m free of morally questionable vices {sex, drugs, rock-and-roll} doesn’t mean that I am disciplined. In fact, I’d be willing to throw out that I am one of the least disciplined people you’ll ever know.
So that’s what I’m thinking about these days, is discipline.
Part of my problem with discipline is that I overindulge. Call me an obsessive compulsive, but when there is something good in my life, I cannot let go of it. I have a hard time partially or temporarily enjoying them. I suffocate things with my adoration.
This morning I was on Pinterest {Duh, I’m a girl} and I saw the most absurd glitter thing I’ve ever seen in my entire life, and since I’ve been thinking about discipline, I immediately learned something from it.
There really is such a thing as too much of a good thing. Just because I don’t really do “bad” things doesn’t mean that an abundance of a good thing isn’t a bad thing in disguise.
Banana bread is good, but I don’t need it with every cup of coffee I have {sobs}. Lauren Conrad pants are awesome, but I don’t need to walk out of Kohls with a new pair when I went to buy socks. Pinterest is helpful, but my time spent being inspired is pointless without action.
and glitter is awesome, but not everything needs to be glittered. I cannot believe I am saying that, but I have brought picture evidence of my statement.
So my first thoughts as I try to wrestle with being a more disciplined person {slowly but surely… I’ve written 1,000 words every day this month!} is to be aware of areas in my life where I am overindulging in good things for no reason other than that they are good.
I’m looking at you, banana bread.
March 16, 2013
21st March 2013 | uncategorized | 3 comments
One of the things on my list this month was to document an ordinary day in pictures.
Get ready for an exciting Saturday in the life of me.
My mom woke me up. The funny part is that I went to take a picture and kept saying “it looks so blurry!” and finally just took the picture… then I realized it was blurry because I’d just woken up and hadn’t yet put my glasses on.
I always love seeing myself first thing in the morning. I usually look in the mirror and go “yeah, you look like you did an awesome job sleeping.” And mostly I have never seen my bathroom look as square as it does in this picture.
Oh boy. Picking out clothes.
I was SUPER excited about my outfit, can’t you tell?
Sat on the stairs and tried to get my cat to let me pet her. She wasn’t down.
My mom has been wanting to go to IKEA for awhile. So we went.
Is that a turtle?
IKEA breakfast. So cheap. and good. except the eggs weren’t that good, but hey. You can’t win it all.
You know what I have in my office? A SINK. You know what that means? COFFEE. Except I have been thinking I should figure out something to put on the wall above the sink. Then I saw this. and was like.. yeah, I should do that. So I took a picture so I wouldn’t forget.
Went to Ashley’s baby shower at Big Dog Coffee in Oregon City. It was adorable and fun and I love Ashley. I won two candles {that smell awesome} and I won the other game, but let someone else get the prize.
Stopped at Music Millennium. Picked up a handful of CDs.
Always nice to come home to a clean room, right? Hah. I hardly spend any time at home, so my room tends to just collect the clothes I take off, the clothes I’ve just washed, shoes and paper.
Finished the day Skyping with Paul. We shared Argyle Sweater comics until my computer died.
I’m so exciting, I know.
How to make your own Pura Vida iPhone case! 4/4s or 5!
18th March 2013 | uncategorized | 1 comment
Okay, so I’m really down with Pura Vida Bracelets. You’re probably like “how down?” and I mean… SUPER DOWN. My girl Lauren Conrad first introduced me to them {that makes us sound like friends, right??} the day after Christmas, when she posted that their WHOLE SITE was 50% off! So I bought a few….
But I was thinking of things to get for Stacy for this month’s CaraBox and I realized I needed to get her a Pura Vida Bracelent. A VERY SPECIFIC one. So I got it… and two more for myself, because there’s a minimum order PLUS I keep giving them away.
Pura Vida sells more than bracelets.. .there are beanies, headbands, wall stuff, hats… and iPhone cases. I. would. really. like. a. Pura. Vida. iPhone. case.
The problem is that every time I go on their website, it’s to buy bracelets. So by the time my cart is $20 full of bracelets, only THEN do I think about getting an iPhone case. But it hasn’t happened.
Today I got my bracelets from Pura Vida, and as I was lovingly staring at my pile of mail {Danielle and Ila sent me letters.. two handwritten letters, two new bracelets? I will think of them when I look at my bracelets} and I realized.. I could probably just make my own Pura Vida iPhone case if I got really creative and was really patient.
So here is my Pura Vida iPhone case DIY!
Today I will be showing you how to make your own version of this awesome Pura Vida iPhone case:
STEP ONE: Order Pura Vida Bracelets. {I personally love these}
STEP TWO: Check your tracking number every day until they arrive.
STEP THREE: Open your package.
STEP FOUR: Find your Live Free sticker.
STEP FIVE: Put sticker on whatever iPhone case you have.
Wear more white.
14th March 2013 | uncategorized | 1 comment
Then, as I was walking, I met this old lady named Elsa who had frizzy read hair and an accent. She was on her way to the hospital to get tests done on the tumor behind her eye. She was out looking for comfortable navy blue shoes. I walked with her for awhile, because I had nowhere to go and nothing to do so it seemed like a good idea to talk to Elsa.
She had a crazy spirit of discernment and was very faithful to it. She looked me straight in the eyes and gave me a few commands. Wear more whit. Rid my home of black and red. Keep at least one fresh flower in my house, never keep dead ones. Enjoy California. Then the bus came, so I hugged her and tried to remember the things she had said.
Of all the ones I’ve remembered, I’ve tried to remember to never keep dead flowers and keep at least one fresh one.
This is weird, but I always keep dead flowers. I guess part of it is because I’m lazy… but part of it is because I have a hard time letting go. of DEAD FLOWERS. Come on, look at that picture… they’re not even beautiful. They remind me of spiders and they’re depressing.
The Bible says to count ourselves dead to sin but alive to Christ, and that is a nice idea until I realize that you don’t keep dead stuff. I re-read my journal from California and a common theme is this idea that I sometimes feel so enslaved to sin. I keep dead things in my life, and that is just unhealthy. Why keep death when there is LIFE to be had?
So today I threw out my dead flowers and replaced them with live ones. and I wore cream.
For you, Elsa.
and for me.
pour out your hearts to Him.
12th March 2013 | uncategorized | 0 comments
Yesterday I wrote about how I cried like Lauren Conrad. That was very therapeutic, because I had a lot of emotions and needed them to GET OUT. After my cry, I got around to getting over it. Dinner and ice cream with Anna helped significantly.
But then I ended up back at home, alone. I was laying in bed, listening to music, when this beautiful song came on. I have never been able to find it online to share with people, but it’s called Psalm 62 by Portrait of Another. The lyrics are… Psalm 62.
The bridge is the part that says “trust in Him at all times, all people. Pour our your hearts to Him, for God is our refuge.”
After the fourth or fifth time it came on repeat, that line hit me.
I had spent a large part of the evening crying and then laughing at my mascara and then whining, then some thinking and staring at the ceiling… and yet God was right there, waiting for me to let my soul find rest in Him, to pour out everything to him. Without expectation or hesitation.
It took maybe five really honest, direct sentences to pour out my heart to God. It wasn’t flowery or ultra-religious words, I was just straight forward and honest and told him what was going on in my heart.
Then, as I was snuggling into my bed, I thought of the lyrics to one of my current fave songs (I have lots of them)…
…and you know what? Pouring out five real, honest sentences to Jesus really did put my heart right. It didn’t fix the problems or dull my pain, but it gave me peace. Jesus said that in this world we’ll have trouble. When I am truly leaving my troubles at the feet of Jesus, the return is not removal of the problem, but is usually the induction of peace. Just a little talk with Jesus does not make it good, but it does make it right.
“In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.”
Jesus {John 16:33}
The day I cried like Lauren Conrad.
11th March 2013 | uncategorized | 5 comments
Lauren Conrad is the best. She’s super classy and she designs great clothes and has awesome websites and I just want to be friends with her. I was originally going to write “I just want to be her,” but decided that wanting to be friends with her would probably be a little bit less creepy.
I’m not sure if you’ve ever watched The Hills, so I’m going to catch you up real quick. Lauren Conrad, who starred on Laguna Beach, moved to Los Angeles after graduating. The cameras followed her while she dated and tried to live with a crazy person and was an intern at Teen Vogue while going to school. You won’t believe this, but since it was reality tv.. there was some drama. And my girl Lauren would cry when there was drama. I GET YOU ON THIS ONE, LC!!! I cry about EVERYTHING. Not because I’m a pansy or super emotional, but sometimes a good cry is quicker and more efficient than talking, writing, playing the piano, etc.
But Lauren was really faithful in wearing mascara, so whenever Lauren would cry, her mascara would start trailing down her face and it would make the dramatic moment EVEN MORE DRAMATIC.
I found a picture for proof..
And finally I just got tired of trying to get myself to believe that, so I CRIED. I sat down and just let the tears flow.
When I say I sat down, it’s important for me to say that I sat down on the toilet.
Because then I had to get up to wash my hands. I needed to say that because I wanted you all to know that I looked in the mirror because I was washing my hands, not because I was wanting to watch myself cry. I grew out of that years ago.
ANYWAY, I looked in the mirror as I was washing my hands and there, running down my cheek…
WAS MASCARA.
I have never Lauren Conrad cried before, and the idea that I was crying like Lauren Conrad made me so stupidly excited that I did what any normal 27-year-old girl who wants to be friends with Lauren Conrad would do… I took a picture. And I texted it to the one person I knew would appreciate it. EMILY. Because I really was that excited.
Then I washed my face and went out to dinner and got over it. That’s what a good cry can do.
Especially when paired with MASCARA.
LOVE YOU LC.
Micah earned a lollipop.
8th March 2013 | uncategorized | 2 comments
Micah missed his Teddy Bear Picnic, so we settled on a decent alternative: Zoo Train in footie pjs with hot chocolate.. ONLY the Zoo Train, mind you. So we grabbed some stuffed animals and headed to the zoo. I tried to get two tickets for the train – the ONLY REASON WE WENT TO THE ZOO IN OUR PAJAMAS – and the guy said the train isn’t running during the week. What was I supposed to do, abort mission and go home?
You try telling that to this guy.
So anyway. We decided to get hot chocolate and were sitting on a bench in the indoor elephant viewing when Micah said he wanted to sit outside. Outside we went and found a bench to sit on and watch the orangutans. There was a bit of commotion about 50 feet away, and I’m kind of nosy, so I listened and pieced together what was happening.
There was a little girl and nobody could find her mom. Two different families were trying to figure out what to do. One family decided they’d all go get security and left this mom, her 8ish-year-old son , and baby to watch this little girl. The Mom was standing there, trying to keep the little girl’s attention so I called out “if she wants, she can come sit on this bench with us.”
Keep in mind that I am dressed like a giant fuzzy zebra wearing pink boots.
The little girl ran over and I let her hold the stuffed dog in my hands. She was happy and seemed completely unaware of the fact that everyone around her was in a state of panic. We talked about the colors on her shirt and on Micah’s pajamas. I asked her what her name was, and she said… well, I wasn’t sure. It sounded like Princess Pea but rhymed with Arissa, because that’s what The Mom thought she said. We kept trying to clarify… “Arissa? Parissa? Marissa? Princess?” I mean.. I really had no idea what she was saying.
I jumped ship on learning her name and instead asked how old she was. She held up four fingers and I told her Micah was four, too. We sat there for awhile, Micah drinking his hot chocolate and occasionally responding to Parissa Princess P. Finally zoo security came over, said that her mom had already reported her missing, and asked our new little friend if she wanted to go back to her mom.
She said no.
I convinced her to go back to her mom, and The Mom thanked me and said I was really great with her. I shrugged and said no problem {children are my spiritual gift, after all…} and Micah and I left.
“I think her name was Melissa,” Micah said as an afterthought. I looked at him and thought of Charles Wallace, who is 5 in the novel A Wrinkle in Time, and has incredible insight.
“You’re probably right,” I responded, “because you’re so used to hearing little kids talk all day and you can understand what they’re saying better than adults can.”
He said yeah.
The last time we were at the zoo store, he asked if he could have a lollipop… because he thought they were free. To show my appreciation of his patience while we sat with Melissa Parissa Princess P, I let him pick out a lollipop. He chose strawberry banana.
And then ten minutes after this picture was taken he marched over to the garbage can and threw it away because he got dog hair all over it. But I’m sure he really enjoyed it while it lasted.
